How To Write Your Life Story

I have posted before about writing your ethical will. It is a way for your loved ones to benefit from the life lessons you have learned when you are no longer around to teach them yourself. Now there is a book available to help you do the job. Ralph Fletcher's book "How to Write Your Life Story" was penned with the goal of helping young people learn to be better writers, but the how-to guide can be helpful no matter what your age. It is available at Amazon.

Five Questions to Consider When Naming A Trustee

The responsibilities of a trustee are often complex and time consuming. Managing trust assets often entails familiarity with tax law, real estate markets, security markets, and financial planning. Often it is the oldest or most responsible heir who is given this duty. Here are some things you should consider before deciding on a trustee.

1. Do you trust this individual? The trustee will need to put your wishes and vision of fairness above any of their own. You must have absolute trust in their integrity.
   
2. Is the person willing? You should be sure they have the time to devote to all the many details that can and surely will arise in performing the duties of trustee. If it would be a burden on their family or career let them know it is okay to decline.
   
3. Would you let them handle your affairs today? If they are lacking in the knowledge and expertise now, it is doubtful they will be a suitable choice in the future.
   
4. Will this choice create ill will among the surviving beneficiaries? The trustee must be able to work through disagreements with and among other beneficiaries. Sometimes family dynamics can make it nearly impossible for the trustee to effectively discharge their duties. Don't make a choice that could lead to ill will among family members.
5. Is this person willing to accept the legal ramifications of serving as trustee? Most states have laws requiring high standards of performance by trustees. You should discuss the potential liability with any prospective trustee.

If you have a suitable relative or heir you should talk about your choice with your other heirs and beneficiaries. Let them know why and how you made your choice. This could alert you to unforeseen problems and also make sure that everyone is working from the same page.

It could be that after asking yourself these questions you may determine that a corporate trustee would be better for all. The most common reason for not naming a corporate trustee is expenses, but don't be penny wise and pound foolish. The reason you went to the trouble of setting up a trust is to protect your loved ones; a poor choice of trustee could make it all a waste.

Your Ethical Will

When you first think about estate planning it is often only about dollars and cents. Who gets what, how to minimize taxes, how to avoid probate. We often forget that the people we love will be facing one of the most emotionally trying times of their life. Yes you need to take care of the financial aspects of your estate but you should also try to incorporate the emotional needs of your loved ones.

Something you should consider is writing an "ethical will". An ethical will is not a legal document, it is like a final chance to communicate with you loved ones. Ethical wills are a way of sharing some of the wisdom you have accumulated over your lifetime. It can be a short letter to your heirs or a long document that includes things like your family history, a statement of your beliefs, and stories about your life that shaped the way you lived. You can include things like where the money your leaving came from, what it meant to you, and how you would like to see it used. If your children or grandchildren are very young, writing an ethical will can provide a link that can reach through the years.

The hardest part is always where to begin. Some ideas that can get you going might be:

• I am most grateful for..
• The most important gift I ever received..
• My parents taught me..
• From my grandparents I learned..
• What mattered the most in my life..

Look at an ethical will as an opportunity to connect your life with future generations, it can be a satisfying experience.

Letter of Instruction

In this months issue of Money Magazine, Jean Chatzky has a good article about writing a letter of instruction to your heirs to help them sort through your affairs should you die. Jean makes the point that often heirs are unaware of where to look to find important documents or whom to contact to find information on your estate. While a letter of instruction is not a legal document, it can help your children or other heirs during a very troubling time. Some of the items Jean suggests for inclusion are:

• The location of estate planning documents (wills, trusts etc.)
• The location of financial documents (tax returns, deeds, bank statements)
• The location of Safe deposit boxes and their keys
• Life insurance policies LTC policies
• Investment accounts and contact information
• Phone numbers for accountants, attorneys, financial and insurance advisors
• Funeral home information if you have made arrangements

Some other items that come to mind:

• Information and passwords for email accounts
  
• Information and passwords on home security systems
• Information and contacts for pensions

While planning for our own deaths is never something we wish to dwell on, making life easier for our heirs is probably a common goal. Maybe looking at it in this light will make this wonderful idea easier to implement.

Why bother with a will?

In going through some files this past weekend I came across this letter written tongue in cheek to someones heirs. It seems worthy of sharing.

Dear loved Ones,

While I understand that I have the right to determine who gets my property when I die, I have decided to let the fair, just and impartial court system make that decision for me. I have decided this, even though it might mean that people I never knew or liked could wind up as my heirs. I also understand that there are perfectly legal and legitimate ways of minimizing the estate taxes that you will have to pay. However, because of our governments kindness and generosity to me over the years, I have decided to let our beloved Uncle Sam take the biggest share of my assets that he can.

In addition, rather than decide who should take care of my children, I think that I would rather have my family fight about it publicly, and then let the courts go ahead and appoint anyone they like, not necessarily one of you. I would also like you to know that I think lawyers, as a group, are hugely underpaid and under loved, and so they should have a large share of my assets.

Finally, I want all the private details of my financial affairs to become part of the public record, so that anyone who is even remotely interested, for any reason, can simply look it up.

Good luck and much love.